On Fear - A Health Coach and Lyme Disease During a Pandemic

Fear is an evolutionary necessity.  It definitely has a critical place in the survival of our species.  I would never condone trying to be completely fearless in life.   That would be reckless.   But, there are helpful fears that keep you alive, and destructive fears that keep you from living your best life.  It is important to analyze and understand the root and message in all of your fears - to be able to move through and actualize your greatest joys.  In our modern world, as we systematically remove dangers one by one, fear still needs a  home and it just moves on to the next thing.  The root of fear, is really the lack of control we have over outcomes.  As a health coaches, we try to move off of fear by exploring how much control we really have.  We do have control over the strength and vitality of our immune system.  We can greatly put the odds in our favor by conscious decisions we make in our lifestyle.  I feel this is greatly missing in the fear based news reporting.  It is constantly pointed out to us how to avoid germs, but rarely explained how germs actually work in the body, what amazing systems you have in place to protect you, and how you can nurture and strengthen those systems.

I want to point this out all the time - but there is a cloud hanging over this message that makes it feel unwanted.  Almost like victim blaming.  But it's not.  Its just truth.  Does this mean you should not be afraid of germs?  No, of course not.  But is your fear informed with facts?  Is it appropriately balanced?

Yes, bad things can still happen.  For example, no matter how much you exercise and eat well for optimal physical health, you may get bitten by a stealthy tick carrying a potentially deadly pathogen.  Even after I pulled that tick off,  I did not believe that this was out of my control - however,  when I sent it away and it tested positive for  Lyme Disease - and I developed the rash, I took a hard fall into facing a threat out of my control.  This is what happened to me  - and believe me, it was painful for a control freak like me!   As I crawled out of this pit, however,  I focused again on what I could control.  I started the antibiotics very early - within two weeks.  I was grateful for my strong and healthy body, which will increase my prospects for success in the face of this threat.

Opportunities in Disguise

So now, I'm fearful of going back in the woods.  But I love hiking in the woods and it has been a source of joy for me for decades.  How do I balance fear of something that also brings me joy.  Just like failures, fears can be transformed into opportunities.  I look for the opportunity presented to me here.  I have the opportunity to learn to be more careful without having suffered serious injury.  I have been reminded of, and hence my appreciation heightened for,  the complexity of my place as human in the natural world.  One minute I own the wooded path - the next minute I'm just a transit system for bacteria.   I had the opportunity to be humbled into a more realistic outlook on the world.

Risk Assessments and Mitigations

We make risk assessments all day long.  Getting in a car has inherent risks, but our desire to be mobile outweighs the risk.  We mitigate these risks with seat belts and airbags.   My risk assessment of hiking in the woods has changed - and therefore so will my mitigations.  I'll be more careful about checking myself for ticks when I come home.  I'll use more repellent and wear white clothes that I will take off as soon as I come home, maybe even on the front porch.  Sorry neighbors.  These mitigations are the things we can control in the face of risks that we cannot.  They will constantly change as we move through the world.

What category of fear is this?

I see fears in categories.  There are things that are going on now that are scary and there are hypothetical scary things that could happen in the future.  Always be wary of a fear that starts with "What if..."   There are an infinite number of ways to finish that sentence!  Why did you pick the one you did?  When I was working on my career change, I had to work through a lot of fears, which I did with the help of a coach.   One of my fears was, "What if I don't have a job and I can't support myself?"  I think I chose this fear because I am, as I've stated, a control freak and I fear needing help.  But to work through this fear I looked critically at the possibility that this hypothetical thing would happen.   Have I ever not been able to find work to support myself and my family?  No, never.  Then why would I make a decision based on that hypothetical?  

It's not just a meme

I really want to bring this around to what I am seeing in the world today, especially in the news and on Facebook.  Just as you will live your best life if you look critically at your fears, you have to look critically at the fears being served to you.   I work with an amazing social studies teacher who teaches students to assess media critically by examining memes.   For just a single picture and a small caption, there can be a lot to mislead someone.  For example, is this meme saying that if you don't was your hands as soon as you get home from grocery shopping, you will get deathly sick?  Because that is not true.  You MAY get sick - but MAY and WILL are very different things and they are often used interchangeably in media.   Likewise, I often see MIGHT happen, presented as a WILL happen.  Why does this matter?  Because it all comes back to that risk assessment.  You cannot make a proper risk assessment and use proper mitigations, if you are not working with the FACTS of the threat.  

In summary, as the great cop on Hill Street Blues (I can't remember his name) said, "Be careful out there".  But be smart out there too!

I love you all :)